Rob and I have been married for five years today.
We were engaged to be married during my last year at Davis. I didn't know anyone else who was engaged or even thinking about marriage. Among the highly educated in my generation, 21 is a ridiculous age to marry- you are still in Jr high for an age cohort that doesn't have children until 35. Although it was an oddity at the beginning, I get the feeling that our marriage is enviable to many of our friends. In our best moments we manage to balance being totally connected with allowing space to celebrate our uniqueness. In some ways I think we've "fallen into" more maturity than we've earned through experience or intelligence (gracious a Dios). Not to paint too rosy a picture... growing into adulthood together has certainly caused tension as we've struggled to carve out a life that has room for lots of personality, two careers and a whole host of different interests.
I am so grateful to have had the last five years with Rob. I am glad we met when we were young. I am glad we were brave enough to choose to commit to each other. I am glad that we fit easily beside each other in life. I'm glad that the time logged or the number of years married doesn't really matter to us because the particular markers are overshadowed by the timelessness of a lifelong love- I can't really remember life before Rob and don't anticipate much life after him- therefore it feels strange to step into a timeline for one day.
All this analysis- I am overjoyed to dress up and go out to a quiet dinner!
2 comments:
When you left for Ghana and we moved to IH, It was surprising to feel so much pain and disorientation at seemingly severed relationships. We felt Rob's pain in letting you go ans we felt pain to not be able to be in touch w/ Rob. It just wasn't right to be split apart. What if we had stayed in IN, I sometimes wonder. Would you have come home from Ghana to be near relatives too? Would you have chosen to get engaged and marry Rob and continue in CA? Probably. Would Dave and Dan have adopted and become regular Hoosiers? Would Dad have adopted and fit in with the fam? What would I be like if I had given up swimming and dad his CA weather benefits.
Well, of course there's no use looking backward, but I think all is as it should be. Hopefully some of the lessons and mistakes we've made will help you and Rob not to make the same mistakes. I'm so thankful for your love and your standard set for others to see. As you both return to Ghana, remember the precious gift of love that God gave you 5 years ago. Happy Anniversary!!
When you left for Ghana and we moved to IN, It was surprising to feel so much pain and disorientation at seemingly severed relationships. We felt Rob's pain in letting you go ans we felt pain to not be able to be in touch w/ Rob. It just wasn't right to be split apart. What if we had stayed in IN, I sometimes wonder. Would you have come home from Ghana to be near relatives too? Would you have chosen to get engaged and marry Rob and continue in CA? Probably. Would Dave and Dan have adopted and become regular Hoosiers? Would Dad have adopted and fit in with the fam? What would I be like if I had given up swimming and dad his CA weather benefits.
Well, of course there's no use looking backward, but I think all is as it should be. Hopefully some of the lessons and mistakes we've made will help you and Rob not to make the same mistakes. I'm so thankful for your love and your standard set for others to see. As you both return to Ghana, remember the precious gift of love that God gave you 5 years ago. Happy Anniversary!!
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