But you are married...

I have gotten a number of strange reactions from people when I tell them that I left my husband at home and came to Central America.
Of course it is very hard to be apart from Rob. Being away from him makes me feel like I am not whole, like a key part of myself is mission. I am a little more melancholy, a little more restricted. A little dulled..
One of the tricky things in marriage is balancing the unity and wholeness of the two as one with the fact that it is a union of separate selves. When I chose to be married, I chose to give part of myself over to a third entity- the space that is "us" - the section of the vine diagram where the circles overlap. Therefore, I am not my whole self when I am far away from Rob. A piece of me cannot really exist in seperation. This is the beauty of marriage and the pain of separation.

But, I hope that I will always continue to value my separateness. No matter how much I love Rob, I still experience the world through individual eyes. It is important to me to keep this individual part strong. I think this is a big reason that I like to travel. I really believe that my experience, insight, heart, passion, burdens, concerns and wisdom are the gift that I have to give to the world around me. Especially, my gift to Rob.
The stronger I am, the wiser I am, the more I care about the world around me, the better wife, friend, daughter, sister, Christian, psychologist- whatever- I will be. Being here right now in this way is the best way I know to cultivate who I am. Just as much as Rob´s love allows me to be here, so I am here for his sake.